Day 26

Today's forcast: Cloudy with a chance of.....Discouragment, self-loathing and a wee bit of unenthused snarls.

Weight: 162.5 lbs (totally deflated by this)

Status: Discouraged.

And today I have lost both confidence and enthusiasm (ah...but only momentarily...I think). I expected the scale to show that I had lost more than 1/2lb. Alas, half a pound is still better than gaining one. It doesn't seem like enough. And I am not satisfied until I see a change on that darn scale. My body has changed quite a bit but I want to see a drop in the poundage. I am not sure if I am more upset about not losing a significant amount of weight, the fact that I am pre-menstrual or the fact that I am disappointed that I am disappointed. Isn't that silly...I am disappointed that I am disappointed. It's like being afraid that I will be afraid. Or I am sad that I am sad. It's like a double whammy! A double portion of discouragement.

It is Friday. I should be celebrating. ARGH! I am going to go run at the gym...hopefully the endorphins will bring back up to the surface of normal. I WILL NOT quit. Quitters can't be winners and it is not in my genetic make up to quit. I live to play, another day!!!


The three qualities necessary for training:
Great faith. Great doubt. Great effort. --Anonymous

Never give up, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn.
--Harriet Beecher Stowe

No giving up!!! Off to the gym!

Andy :)