Day 37

My fat monster is hungry. And it cries out at the midnight hour for a morsel of bread. (She is starving to death....hehehe...and so I prevail once again).

This whole ‘working out’ thing has my...well...ummmm....how do I say it....well....my bra is too big. Why the heck am I losing weight there? It brings me back to the days of Judy Bloom and the all so popular book, ‘Are you there, God? It’s me, Margaret’. I am almost certain that every girl read this book in grade 6...at least my little group of friends did. Lately, I find myself muttering softly in the morning when I dress... “We must, we must, we must complete our bust. The bigger the better the tighter the sweater, the boys depend on us”. It worked when I was 13...I can’t see any reason why it won’t work now.

Unfortunately, I did not run yesterday. The gym here was so so so yucky! I could not bring myself to touch the sticky with black goo excercise equipment. Blech...I can still see it and....hold that thought while I go and spew........

So tomorrow will be chest day and cardio day. I despise chest day with every ounce of my being. I wish I could lift more. I am so weak chested...well endowed...but weak. OKAY! I USED TO BE WELL ENDOWED! But do not fret...I still got it!! I am after all in a C cup. Bigger than B and smaller than D...the perfect size....won’t you agree?

So to face facts, if I am going to improve the strength of my chest then I need the help of a spotter. However, I have been too embarrassed to ask. There are only old ladies that smell like old soap and big sweaty body builders who grunt and groan as if they are bulls servicing cows....that is who is nearby when I need help. And I just don’t want to look up at the ummm....er.....*legs* of whoever is helping me. This is because...some people just don’t wear the proper length of shorts.....are you picking up what I’m laying down....(bleh). Come on buddy!!! Don’t you know that private parts are just that....PRIVATE. Wear some decent shorts!!!! OR put on some frigging underwear that keeps everything in! AHH!

Anyways.......there was a drop of golden sunshine at the gym the other day. Sunshine, lollipops and rainbows...and everything that’s wonderful...that’s how I felt in this moment! There was a guy laying on the bench...and he was working hard. Drops of sweat sprayed everywhere and the ring around his neck proved that he was really pushing himself. The part that brought a sparkle to my eye was when I noticed he was lifting only the bar...lol...and inside my head...I gloated. I gloated a lot. (Ahhh...the wonderful glory of gloating.....)