Day 44

Sick day today. I feel less than motivated to be fit. Maybe it's the wintery weather. Perhaps it is the fact that I feel "not so hot". Maybe it is the fact that Christmas is around the corner. That is really starting to concern me. Christmas! How am I going to get through the Christmas season eating rice cakes and cottage cheese. Christmas is the time of year that I put cottage cheese on my butt...not on my plate! This year will have to be different. And in honor of this festive season, we will put a candle in a rice cake to celebrate baby Jesus' birth and leave carrots and celery out for the fat old man that will stuff his body through my chimney. Because hell will freeze over before I leave chocolate chip cookies out for anybody!! And how dare he waste the crumbs! Ever notice what a pig Santy Clause is. Good Lord buddy, get it in your mouth....who are you...the cookie monster??

It could be that today, I am craving sugar like you would not believe. I have never been so healthy in my life and have cut out everything that is not good for me. I can honestly say that I have not craved anything. That is until today. I can say that the craving goes deep. Like, my stomach seems to be a bottomless pit. And of course, I do not want cucumbers, pickles or lettuce (free foods). I want something created by the master of darkness...yes...the white stuff...........sugar! I want a fix. No..not a banona...just plain old sugar. AH! A diet Pepsi will have to do. I hope it works. I guess where there is a will, there is a way. And I must not submit to the fat monster now. NO...too much of a price has already been paid to throw in the towel. The fat monster may have won a battle or two with me...but I will win this war!

I did make it to the gym today. This is how it went...

See fatty. See fatty run. See fatty run fast. Go, go, go. Go fatty. See fatty. See fatty run. See fatty run slow. Slow, slow, slow. Poor fatty. She is tired. See fatty. See fatty quit. Fatty is a quitter.

Weigh day tomorrow....God help me....If I am not back down to 160.5 lbs, I will not be given a cheat day on Saturday. And the way I'm feeling right now....well...I NEED my cheat day like I need air to breathe. For now...if you don't find me in my bed sleeping...I will be in the kitchen serenading the love of my life...(sugar).

You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw your face in a crowded place,
And I don't know what to do,
'Cause I'll never be with you.

Night night!!!!