Day 106

5 a.m. came with a vengeance this morning as I woke up absolutely famished. I have never felt so uncomfortable in my life. I laid in my bed for an hour and a half thinking about how good breakfast would taste and feel. And it's not a good sign when a person is dreaming about how good oatmeal will taste. And then I fell asleep. And then I woke up again and I was sure I had the flu as I felt like I was going to woof my cookies. However, how can one "woof their cookies" if one's stomach is completely empty? It's called dry heaving...and there is nothing good about that.

So after eating my oatmeal, protein shake and orange, I felt way better. However, shortly after feeling better about my breakfast, I went to make my bed and noticed that my finger (the one I cut last night making supper) split open and bled right by my pillow. Of course, I am completely disgusted as I forgot about it until now. Now being...the time I get back into bed for the night. ARRRGH!

I did however, surprise myself today when I went to the bathroom and pulled my dress pants down....and realized that I forgot to undo them. Wooo...bye bye hips. This is a good sign and it makes me think that all the running is worth it. It is right??

I am getting all psyched up for Thursday as we are filming our first two minute episode of chunky monkey. AHHH!! My nerves are definitely not nerves of steal!!! I am not feeling very fit....and doesn't television make you look fatter than you already are?! AHHH!!!!! I just spent three months losing ten pounds...now a camera is going to add twenty! My heart crumbles into a pile on the floor only to be swept up and thrown into the trash. (DRAMA...I know...but I can't help it....it's part of who I am so....just deal with it).

I hope I can sleep. Nervousness plus hunger...not a good combo. Throwing up now....

Sweet Dreams!!!

Chunky